Simon strikes a pose

/ Jo Bird / 5 Comments

Richard and I usually go to bed around 10:00pm. The house is dark and quiet. I guess Simon doesn’t like it. During the day he is a pretty content baby, but once the lights go out…

I try to put him to bed around 9:30 so he’ll be asleep by the time we are ready to sleep. Without fail he wakes up around 10:00 ready to party. So we hang out, the two of us, until about 11:30. He’s looking at me now,wide-eyed, as I type. I love babies.

the first rough day

/ Jo Bird / 8 Comments
I already mentioned that I had a goal of waking up and showering before the kids were up in the morning. I have been doing well at this until this morning. Simon is a great sleeper at night, once he falls asleep. But each night the past few days he has stayed up later and later being fussy. So this morning I didn’t make an effort to get up. I woke up as the sun came through my window and knew I was in trouble. My other mistake that set me up for failure this morning was neglecting another goal of mine, to have the kitchen clean each night when I go to bed. This proved to be the cause of additional stress.

I asked Richard what time it was and he told me, 7:30. Exactly the time to wake up Cameron for school. As I attempted to do so (he was not cooperative) Eli started crying because he had wet the bed. I changed his clothes but left the sheets to be dealt with later. I continued to “encourage” Cameron to wake up and get dressed while I started breakfast. I made Cameron’s lunch all the while he sat on the laundry floor crying about the clothes he wanted to wear. I was beginning to lose patience. A mother’s life is a great deal of what I referred to earlier as “encouraging.” Nagging is probably the better word. “Wake up, wake up, WAKE UP! Get dressed, get dressed GET DRESSED! Eat your breakfast, eat, EAT!” In thinking about the morning later I’ve decided that there has to be a better way. Cameron needs to take a little initiative and do those things without my “encouragement.” I’ll be working on a plan for that…

About this time Miriam woke up, and so I got her breakfast. Then Simon woke up but his breakfast was going to have to wait until Cameron got off to school. More nagging. “Put your jacket on, get your backpack, watch out the window for your ride. Don’t make her wait, it’s rude to make people wait.” Simon is not happy, lots of crying. The ride comes, he’s on his way.

I fed Simon first breakfast, I try to feed him small meals to help with the spit-up, knowing that he’ll be hungry again shortly. Miriam is done with breakfast, clean her up and change a poopy diaper. Eli is done with breakfast, clean him up and get him ready for preschool. It’s only 8:42, I have time to eat breakfast myself!

Let the dog out, feed the dog, take Eli to preschool. Upon returning home, Simon is ready for second breakfast. For the first few minutes, without her brothers there to entertain her, Miriam is attempting to climb all over me. Then she disappears. It’s quiet, I’m nervous. I finish feeding Simon, he spits up all over but it’s his turn to wait again. Miriam is in the kitchen, eating someone’s bowl of tomato and rice soup from last night’s dinner. Big red mess. Change her clothes. Back to Simon. Change his diaper, change his clothes. I want a shower. I smell like spit-up and haven’t washed my hair since Sunday. What to do with Miriam. I grab the magna-doodle that she loves and keep her in the bathroom with me. Take a shower, when I get out she is poopy again. I start to change her, it’s a blow out. Change her clothes again, plus now she has a diaper rash.

Everywhere I go in the house someone or something demands my attention. The diaper garbage can is overflowing, the kitchen is still a mess, Miriam’s poopy and soupy clothes need to be washed, Eli’s sheets need to be changed. Not to speak of other household messes and tasks. I’m definitely feeling overwhelmed.

A knock at the door. It’s the J-Dubs. Sorry J-Dubs, not today. A phone call. It’s Richard and he has good news. It brightens my day. Another phone call. It’s my mom, and she’s going to come get the kids in the afternoon. I think I’m going to make it! Simon is asleep. I look around for Miriam. She is curled up on the floor with her blanket, sucking her thumb. It’s only 10:27 and I think she is as exhausted as I am. So I pick her up and we rock in the recliner for awhile. But it’s almost time to pick up Eli from preschool and I haven’t dried my hair yet.

I love the life I’m living. I really do. On most days diaper rashes and laundry are easy enough to handle. And the pay-offs are great. Cameron had a great report card. Eli sings songs to Simon. Miriam gives kisses. And of course Simon meets the measure of his creation by just existing.

This afternoon I’ll put the house together and take a nap. Tonight I’ll clean the kitchen before I go to bed and in the morning I’ll get up early and shower.

He keeps us laughing

/ Jo Bird / 3 Comments

I’ve hesitated to teach my children the proper names for anatomical parts because at a young age they don’t understand that some things shouldn’t be shouted in public or shared in casual conversation with strangers. The following story made my withholding the information all worthwhile.

We were all sitting at the dinner table when Eli left in a rush to use the bathroom. From the bathroom he called out to me that the water was too cold. I went to help assist him and upon returning to the dinner table I commented

“Eli must be the only child who washes his hands before he goes to the bathroom.”

Apparently he heard me because he shouted back to us all:

“I HAVE to or else my peeing thing will get dirty!”

I thought about explaining to him that it is generally accepted by society that the “peeing thing” is inherently dirty and therefore hands should be washed after going potty, but I couldn’t because I was laughing too hard.

back-blog

/ Jo Bird / 3 Comments

There are a couple things I never got around to posting about before Simon came along, but I wanted to blog-ument (made up word that I love to use) them.

The first was moving Miriam into her “big girl bed.” We wanted the transition to take place before Simon’s arrival so they would be separate events in her mind and she wouldn’t feel like she was being replaced in the crib.

It didn’t go so well at first. In fact, it was heartbreaking. She seemed scared and confused and wouldn’t stay in the bed. For the first couple weeks we were moving her from the floor by the bedroom door to her bed after she fell asleep. She occasionally still gets out of her bed at night and lays by the door, but she doesn’t cry anymore and there is definite progress. I think she also enjoys the freedom of getting up out of bed in the morning whenever she wakes up. And Richard and I love to see her walk out of her room with her crazy bed-head of hair and greet us in the mornings.

Our saving grace when it came to surviving this ordeal was her blankie and thumb. She can handle anything with her two self-soothing necessities.

He’s a [happy] spitter

/ Jo Bird / 4 Comments
Because of Simon’s reflux the pediatrician recommended I keep him semi-upright after feedings. I usually put him in the bouncer/carseat/swing for a little while after he eats. The carseat specifically warns against placing it on furniture, but after doing a brief risk analysis I decided it was in his best interest. While I was in the shower I felt he would be best kept out of harm’s (Miriam’s) way on the bed.

After my shower I discovered him like this. I guess keeping him at a 45 degree angle can only help so much. Fortunately he is what the pediatrician calls a happy spitter. Miriam was also a happy spitter; although they frequently regurgitate their meal it doesn’t seem to affect their temperment. I know his expression doesn’t look happy, but what I mean is that he doesn’t vocalize his grievances. Eli was a grumpy spitter (if you know Eli, this comes as no surprise), and I’m glad we aren’t dealing with that again.

Then there were four

/ Jo Bird / 6 Comments
I don’t want to over-dramatize this, but I feel as though today marks the beginning of a new chapter in my life. After taking some paternity leave Richard has returned to work today, leaving me alone to embark on my journey as a stay-at-home mother of four.

On Friday Richard left for a couple hours for a lunch meeting at work. It was a beautiful day so I decided to take the troop to the park. As if the adventure of a first outing with four kids wasn’t enough, I brought the dog along. She has been terribly neglected of late and I knew she needed to play as much as the kids. But it was a foolish mistake.

I removed the kids from the van one by one, and then let Misha out. It took about five seconds before someone was bleeding. Fortunately it was Miriam, the least likely to care about mere flesh wounds. But Eli freaked out at the blood and for a moment I was tempted to load everyone back up and return home. But I sent Eli off to the playground, cleaned up Miriam and we had a nice time thereafter.

Ever since I found out I was pregnant I’ve had anxiety about taking care of four kids. After Miriam was born it took me months to feel like I had things under control. So I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to enjoy this time rather than simply feeling like I’m surviving it. The strongest impression that I had was that I needed to wake up before the kids each morning. It completely changes my mood if I am prepared for the day before the children start thrusting their needs upon me. I managed to get off to a good start this morning. One for one.

I know there are mothers-of-four, five, six, and so on, everywhere, handling their responsibilities with grace and organization. But I want to use my blog to document this time with the hopes of offering encouragement to others, but also selfishly looking for encouragement from others.

In the words of the Cat in the Hat,

“Here we go, go, go on an adventure!”

my name is Simon

/ Jo Bird / 11 Comments

Simon Sterling Bird. Sterling was my great-grandfather’s name. I came into the world in a big hurry on March 24th. Well, once it was actully time to come I had second thoughts and made my mom work for it. I weighed 7lbs 7oz at birth but now I’m down to 6lbs 14oz.

Just like my siblings before me I have jaundice and reflux. So I spent a few days as a glow worm on the bili-blanket. I even had to have an upper GI test done to make sure my digestive anatomy was developed properly. (Those are big words for a six-day-old baby.) Which it was. I will probably just go through lots of laundry and gain weight slowly. That’s just the way we Bird babies come.

My dad got Strep throat and a sinus infection two days after I was born and my mom got sick too. It’s been a bit rough around here. But I’m lucky to have helpful grandmas and my parents have lots of other helpful friends and family. Things are going much better. Even my sister Miriam is adjusting well. No regression whatsoever…

The adjustment bureau

/ Jo Bird / 5 Comments

I just heard about the Adjustment Bureau. I’m so relieved. Is this the branch of the government that comes into your home following the birth of your child to assist in the family’s adjustment period? Do they manage household tasks like the endless laundry from a newborn with reflux, the three meals required to feed the other children, and even return phone calls to well-wishers? I imagine they have a team of experts in child psychology to help meet the needs of the displaced 16 month old. And it would be nice to have medical providers on hand to answer all questions related to postpartum, infancy and other unrelated illnesses that family members might inconveniently contract during the adjustment period. Someone give me the number so I can sign up! (I hope to return to blogging following said adjustment period.)

a chiropractic convert

/ Jo Bird / 6 Comments

Let me be straight.

Before yesterday I was a true skeptic of chiropractors. I did not trust them, I never went to one and never planned to.

A couple months ago I was having pregnancy related hip issues and my OB referred me to a chiropracter. It must have been written all over my face my feelings about “those doctors.” She reassured me that he wasn’t a quack and that she trusted him. I took the business card but had no intention of following through. I really did not believe he could help. Or maybe he would help but it would mean I would have to have weekly appointments the rest of my life and I would be totally reliant on his “tricks” to live a new normal.

Last Friday after a week of enduring brief but excruciating pains in my back, ribs and shoulder on my right side I called my OB’s office in desperation. The nurse took matters into her own hands and before I knew it I had an appointment with a chiropractor. Honestly, I was so exhausted and miserable I was willing to try anything. The pain was the worst at night and in the midst of a sound sleep I would be shocked back to wakefulness, and bring Richard along with me as I inadvertently exclaimed in pain. I moved back and forth from my bed to the recliner to try to get comfortable.

Enough complaining, I said I was through with it and I meant it.

So yesterday I went to my appointment. I was very nervous. Where was this man going to touch me? Was it going to hurt? I was literally sweating. But he was professional, he talked me through everything asked my permission before applying his “techniques” and explained in medical jargon what was going on. I was impressed with his style and methods but not convinced it was going to make any differene. But it did feel good.

I slept better last night than I have in 10+ nights. There were no shooting pains and I even slept on my right side which I haven’t done in just as many nights. The only thing that brought me back to wakefulness was my cramped and overactive bladder.

Some might say that my pains were psychosomatic and I had just enough hope that the chiropractor would work, that he did. Maybe so, but nonetheless it worked. Frankly I’m still a little skeptical myself and I am just waiting for things to get bad again. But I’ve been converted enough, that if they do I will return to his healing hands.

I consider this a lesson that came as a huge blessing. As they say, don’t knock it until you’ve tried it.